There’s nothing wrong with us. Our size is perfect despite what we see reflected in society and on the racks of department stores. This is an issue I have struggled with for a while, but has become even more frustrating during pregnancy. This post is for women of all shapes and sizes, pregnant or not. I will share some of what works for me at the end of this blog post!
Being a size 32H is not easy in this world. The fashion industry has come along way, but it always breaks my heart when I get excited see something comes in “big bust sizes!” only to find it goes up to a DDD... 4 sizes below mine. Sadly, when shopping, a lot of the time I’m treated like an inconvenience for having a unique size.
It’s part a vanity thing- wanting clothes that look good and fit, but part an actual health issue. Not being able to find many bras, especially sports bras that fit right, has caused an inability to do high impact workouts, extreme chafing and back pain. When I was marathon training, it became obvious that my almost-fitting bras were not the real deal. I experienced chafing to the point of bleeding around the straps and underside of my breasts after every long run. The truth is, there are sports bras out there that fit, but nothing that fits and can withstand a seriously high impact workout.
This post isn’t to complain- I thank the Universe every day to have a healthy body that’s growing a healthy baby, but trying to find even one bathing suit to wear on our baby moon, dress to wear to upcoming weddings and single sports bra to workout in has been close to impossible and I’m far from alone when it comes to sizing issues.
I know it’s a problem for women everywhere for all different reasons and leads to both physical and emotional health issues. I just want to say: There’s nothing wrong with our shoulders, hips, thighs, breasts, and tummies. But rather something wrong with a society and fashion industry that despite coming a long way, just isn’t there yet.
I don’t have the perfect solution, but want to share some mindset shifts as well as clothing choices for curvier, bustier women that I have found to be the best options out there!
What’s helped my mindset:
Know that I’m far from alone. Finding women with the same issues, websites and blogs that share others who look like me and avoiding being bombarded with images that make me feel less than perfect helps tremendously. It doesn’t mean that you’re a hater if you unfollow influencers/models/companies who make you feel bad about yourself- even if they seem like the most well intended, saintly person or organization ever! I felt kind of bad unfollowing a lot of the accounts that I looked to for fashion inspo but seeing flat chested and tummied women was causing me to think too much about the body I sometimes default to wishing I had rather than appreciating the beautiful one I am blessed with. Again, this is about US and our needs, not about them and having to justify based on if we like them as a person or company. They’ll be just fine!
Reminding myself that it is a problem with society and the fashion industry and not with me! I have to constantly tell myself this over and over when shopping. The anger and frustration has to go somewhere. Rather than channel is towards myself, I channel it there, which seems healthier and honestly well deserved! It’s about time we don’t have to deal with this anymore!
Only wearing clothes that are flattering. When I tell myself I look great, I want to believe it. I’m sure there are enlightened folks out there who can put on a paper bag and feel truly beautiful, but I haven’t gotten to that point yet and am guessing most of us haven’t. Even though it takes so much time and commitment, only wearing things I like how I look in is always worth it- even when that means wearing the same thing 3 times a week!
Current Favorite Options for Bustier Women:
Freya (suit in bottom photo): This brand has saved my whole life. I want to meet the founder and give them a big kiss one day! I started wearing their bras and bathing suits a few years ago when I had other options as well, but now they are literally my only bra option! Although other brands make my size, the bras still don’t fit right and the cups aren’t big enough. The only styles that somewhat fit in the other brands are so matronly looking that Id rather go bra-less than be caught dead in them to be honest. I currently love this t-shirt, maternity/nursing and strapless bra as well as the Remix and In The Mix bathing suit tops.
Anita. (sports bras- not pictured): This is the only sports bra I currently own that actually fits and is supportive/ comfortable. It’s shocking that it doesn’t have underwire because it feels as supportive as the bulkier sports bras that do.
Phat Buddha (tanks in top photo): When I hear “one side” I am usually turned off thinking threes no way it will fit my chest, but I have found the Phat Buddha tanks to be tight enough to give extra support to my chest (without an ill fitting shelf bra), but stretchy enough to adjust to my changing size.